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A self-portrait from a different time,
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feels like a different time,
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even though it's only a couple of years ago
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or one and a half years, if that,
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and it was my commentary on COVID
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and how I was feeling about it at the time,
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which was a lot of mixed feelings
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which I think everybody had obviously,
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it was very dystopian time
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when you couldn't travel interstate and with curfews
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and I couldn't drive in Melbourne where I'm based
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more than five kilometres for a large amounts of time.
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So just things you could never think
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that would possibly happen.
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And so, the hands are very much,
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oh my goodness and a mask.
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So representing the mask.
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And then the paint brush, this is the artist side of me
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and feelings that as an artist I had.
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For me, it was just the noise stopping around me
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and just being able to go, (expires air)
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and breathe a little bit,
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but very confusing because yes, I was feeling that
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and that was good, but then also worried about other things
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and couldn't travel to see my daughter
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and all of those sorts of things as well.
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So sort of that's the essence of the painting
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but then it's sort of, for me now, personally
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it's taken on a different meaning
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'cause it's a person from a different time,
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'cause the hair's such a focus
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and not just going through cancer treatment
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I look like I've got a lot of hair now
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six months ago was bald as mat,
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so, and it's colour, everything's quite different.
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And so, it's interesting looking at that
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and seeing that as such a document
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and it's different time,
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even though it's not that long ago,
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it's sort of, it's yeah, it's a little weird actually,
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but I think that through COVID also
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like it's the gasp and a lot of horrible things
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that were around,
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but I do think there are also some really good things
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that happened as well.
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And I do like to be a little bit of Pollyanna
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and look at the bright side of everything.
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I think that people around me at least
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I was very lucky, rallied during the COVID time
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during the cancer time.
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And I think I've come through a time
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where I'm going like this and thinking,
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"Oh my goodness, what's going on in the world,"
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where I'm going, "Oh, people are okay, they're good."
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And yeah, so that actually means quite a lot,
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lot of emotions in there when I'm good at.
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And what does this winning this prize
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mean to you?
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Ah, so much, so much.
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I mean it's the National Portrait Gallery
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which is just extraordinary for me.
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This is the pinnacle for a portrait artist to be here.
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So it's an incredible honour first and foremost
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from a practical perspective
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I'm going to use it to extend my art practise
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and start working more in portrait sculpture
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which is my next sort of stage for the moment at least.
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We'll see how, where that goes.
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So it's got many facets to it that are just fantastic.
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So yeah, it means a huge amount to me actually.
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And do you have any words for any maybe
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young female artists who are coming through now?
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Any words of advice or anything
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that you wish that maybe you could go back
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and say to your young female artist self,
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now that you've won the Darling Portrait Prize?
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Yeah, just to have the courage I guess,
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and just keep doing it
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and be aware that there can be subliminal messages
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maybe out there that they may not know.
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And just to question that sometimes
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that it's changing obviously,
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and with so much getting better, and better and better
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all the time, but yeah, just to have faith
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and know that women artists are amazing, as are men as well.
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All artists are amazing, but it's good for women
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to have their voice and do we love it?
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Just enjoy it,
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'cause that's what I do.
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It's just a passion and I love it to death.
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So yeah.